After a divorce, you often have new issues and interpersonal struggles to deal with that you did not have to worry about before.
If talking with your co-parent can frequently leave you frustrated or nervous, then you may need to learn how to deal with aggression.
Determine your boundaries
According to Psychology Today, many people feel overwhelmed in child custody situations because they do not express what boundaries they have. Your ex-spouse may continually focus on old arguments or disagreements that leave you both feeling exhausted.
Making it clear that your marriage is over and you only want to contact your ex-spouse because of childcare reasons can help you both have strong boundaries.
Focus on formality
While you may feel the urge to talk about your innermost thoughts to your ex-spouse once in a while, make sure to only discuss the facts about when you need the children picked up or any other issues. It can help to write out your replies or messages in text or email since you have more control over what you want to include.
Typing out what you want to say also gives you the ability to think about and edit your message instead of feeling pressured to immediately reply.
Pick a goal
Before beginning a conversation, think carefully about what goal you want to achieve or the piece of information you want to convey. Having a clear idea in mind about what you want to say can help your co-parent not distract you with his or her snide comments or aggravating replies.
Learning how to deal with an aggressive co-parent can bring more calm into your life.
